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Friday, April 03, 2009

It's hard to stay in top form. Just need to rant, need people to know. I'm very scared for our choir's syf. Expectations that don't come from others just impacts more. It's not like we're going to sing to compete, but having the passion to sing gives you the urge to sing well, and when you don't.. yknow. everything just stops short.

I dno. Everything in my head's going in circles and I can't think straight, hence this superbly incoherent entry. (supposed to be doing PI). Need some silent comforts, need to rethink my thoughts. becos serz, I'm getting quite sick of this. Having to remind others while making every attempt to keep mindful of techniques(which is so fundamental- not musicality, there isn't much joy in every song I sing), trying not to oversing, wdv wdv. Know that it's responsibility and the section (if not choir) has to move as one, but what more can I do when I'm already so frustrated on my own. I don't want to implode just weeks before the big day everyone's harping about. Going to step back into the shadows and let things fall into place. I hope to get my faith back, and that if I believe enough, everything will be alright.

It's just me. I'm a mess. But I'm trying to get back into shape. I want to humble myself: I'm not the strength of a section. Nobody can ever be. (self reminder)

by some arabian girl :)
20:32


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